ME, McGEE, and a BIG EFFING BEAR

Me and wee McGee go for his poopoo-peepee walks, about 4 times on average every day. Quite a lot of wildlife reside around our home at the base of Green Mountain, which include ring-eyed raccoons, stinky skunks, prickly porcupines, squirrly squirrels, cautious coyotes, delightful deer, magnificent moose and burly bears. So it's not unusual to see an animal at any given time. Take for instance, a few days ago, we saw 3 moose strolling across the road and last evening, around dusk, getting darker by the minute, I dang near jumped out of my headband. I had been completely mesmerized by the gorgeous leaves flitting down from the trees like butterflies that I failed to notice a large black shape standing at the edge of the road about 3 bear pounces away. Needless to say, my Sherman-shuffle came to an abrupt halt when I locked eyes with a big ole black bear. McGee came to a complete standstill too and cocked his head in wonderment. Like a Mexican-standoff, me, McGee and the bear didn't know if we should crap or go blind. I considered offering the dog to the bear as a tasty morsel, while I, the main course, shuffled on back home, that is, until the bear did a perfect pirouette and dashed off into the forest, soon disappearing amidst the trees and bushes. The way that bear hightailed it through the woods, I knew for a fact then, that there is no way, even when I was young and able to leap high bar stools in a single bound that I could outrun a bear. When the sounds of the bear crashing through the forest could no longer be heard, we continued on our walk but I can tell you, this old hippie-dippie, long-haired dude was a whole lot more alert and my pants felt slightly sticky...cheers, eh! 

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